I am ridiculous

I should start this post out on a positive note before I go diving into the reasons why I'm ridiculous. First, I'm really proud of myself for sticking to my daily exercise goals for most of the week (until the weekend), and for cooking nearly every single day (until the weekend). Most importantly, I didn't have any soda the entire week, PLUS the weekend!

But now, on to an entertaining anecdote about why I'm pathetic.

As per usual, this weekend was rough. For reasons that are varied, I consumed pizza, cheesy potatoes, cake, ice cream, leftover pizza, hot dogs, pulled pork and cookies.

But this isn't why I'm pathetic. This is only the beginning.

We had family over to dinner who are diet soda people, so we had fresh lime for their drinks. As I was slicing them I remembered just how much I love regular Coke with lime and, because my husband is awesome and only keeps soda I don't like in the house, my craving for cola was intense. Not enough to drink diet, mind you; I do have my standards. Instead, I put the leftover limes in a plastic baggie and tucked them away in the fridge.

I thought about those stupid limes all night (even while eating chocolate chip cookies!) and into the next day until I could contain the craving no more. Instead of breaking down and drinking the Diet Pepsi in the fridge, or even going to the store to buy a real Coke, I decided to take the limes into work and visit the precious, evil soda fountain there.

I am embarrassed to admit this, but I swear it was like I was smuggling a baggie of drugs, like I had to be furtive and hide the shame of my crime.

Moose Baby was in his high chair when I stashed the bag of limes first in my coat pocket, then in my purse where it would be safer, and when we made eye contact I'm telling you I could see disdain in his pudgy little face. I could almost hear him sigh and say, "I'm disappointed in you, mom. I thought you had moved past this, but I guess I was wrong."

But even that sad, psychologically-jarring reprimand did not stop me from carrying out my plan. I got to work even more determined to drink the stupid Coke and be done with the whole business, so I went straight up to the soda machine.

It was out of Coke.

Alas, even that did not deter me from consuming carbonation. I settled for stupid Pibb Xtra, squeezed in my stupid contraband limes, and drank my stupid forbidden soda.

And it was delicious.




This, my friends, is addiction.