Perception vs. reality

Sometimes I think I'm skinnier than I am. In obvious ways this is a bad thing for reasons relating to denial and delusion. But in many other ways this is good, because I don't obsess about my weight, I still feel pretty, and I think I look good in (most of) my clothes.

I'm starting to think my clothes have contributed to my current state. For one, I've been a crazed shopaholic, so if I got too big for something I had no problem buying something new to replace it.

But the main contributing factor, however, is something more complicated.

Despite going from a size 4 to a size 12 in about five years, I still like how I look in clothing. This is because I've learned a lot of tricks for dressing my body and making the most out of every item, whether camouflaging my tummy or making my legs look smaller or longer. My size may change but my body type doesn't, so I keep applying these same tricks and get the same outcome: a shapely, well-proportioned frame.

This is a great skill because I can always feel confident, stylish and pretty in whatever I wear. I don't want to blend into the walls, I don't hate my body and I feel I have more control over my appearance.

But maybe this is starting to be a problem. Maybe I have TOO MUCH control, and it's easy to hide behind figure-trimming tricks than burn calories.

Even worse, I fear my perception and my reality are diverging ever more by the day. For example, last week I bought a great pair of very mod, casual-Audrey-Hepburn grey cropped twill pants (on sale for $10!). I made an outfit around them that I was crazy about -- textured grey v-neck T-shirt, bright yellow cardigan, silver chain earrings and leopard print flats -- and I felt like hot stuff all day.

Moody Mod by roxiemaxx featuring slimming tops

Then I got home that night, with my makeup faded and my clothes a little rumpled, and had a longer look in the mirror.

All day I must have been thinking I looked like some little Gap commercial girl, all willowy and mod. The mirror told a different story. Try as I might (and believe me, I keep trying), cropped pants are just not a good look for me. Neither are skinny jeans. And a T-shirt is not always a friend to my midsection.

So now I'm confused.

It's NEVER wrong to feel confident about your looks. In fact, clothing should help you do just that. I truly believe that when you think you look good in an outfit or hairstyle, you shine. When that happens, people notice YOU and not the clothes -- so in the end, it doesn't really matter what size you are or that you don't have the perfect shape.

With as good as I felt that day, I'm sure I had that shine. I was happy, and I had great interactions with people because of that. And even though I didn't like how my body looked at the end of the day, I will still wear that outfit because I love it, and I love myself.

So, are clothes a problem? Probably not. Is hiding behind them a problem? Maybe. I'm not sure. While learning how to dress your body, flaws and all, and feel confident in your appearance is something everyone should learn, I guess it could be an issue if you let that be good enough and stop trying to improve.

I will stay confident, happy, and sassy in my clothes, but I can't let that be the end of it. I have to find a balance between accepting my body and having a desire to be better.

Recipe Roundup

As promised, here is the recipe for kale chips from Hannah. Looks yummy!

Hello there.  My name is Hannah Cowles and I am a stay at home mom who works part time at a family restaurant in Upstate NY, so needless to say I am always on the go.  This is a great recipe to make and bring for a healthy alternative to potato chips.  The beauty of this recipe is you can make it taste anyway you would like.  All you need to do is just add a couple of spices and some wonderful kale, and voila-Yumminess!

Hope you all enjoy!

Ingredients

• 1 large bunch Tuscan kale (10 to 12 leaves) if you don't have Tuscan Kale you can substitute for any local kale that is at your farmers market or grocery mart.  Just make sure that you get rid of the stalk and the rough parts of the leaves. Also use the scraps for a homemade veggie stock.  So good! :)
• 1 tablespoon olive oil
• Sea salt to taste
• Fresh ground pepper to taste
• Any seasonings you prefer.  I like oregano, basil, turmeric and chili pepper.

Directions

Preheat oven to 275°F.

Remove stalks and ribs from kale. Rinse and dry leaves. If they are organic, rinse several times because they will have silt from the sand.

Toss leaves in a large bowl with olive oil, just enough to cover them.  Sprinkle leaves with sea salt and ground pepper, and the seasonings you chose.

Arrange leaves in a single layer onto a baking sheet. Bake for approximately 30 minutes or until crisp. Make sure you watch. I put my clock on for 25 to make sure they don't overcook.

Transfer and let cool onto a wire rack or paper towels.

AND ENJOY!  They are so good, and my kids just eat them up. :)

Thanks Hannah. I'm interested to hear if other kids like these too. That's the real test on snacks!

Looking for some walking buddies

First off, my weekly recipe roundup will be a little late this week. We will have a guest post from my friend Hannah on homemade kale chips.

OK, so this blog of accountability isn't helping me quite shed the pounds like I'd hoped, and I'm still really struggling with finding the time (and motivation) to get my cardio in. It's time to step up my efforts and reach out to you, my supportive family and friends.

I want to start a walking group and I'm opening it up to anyone interested. We can choose set days with different times to accommodate people with various schedules. For example, Monday at noon, Wednesday at 6 p.m., Saturday at 10 a.m. So instead of having to decide when and where each time we will always know and can plan accordingly. We can switch up the locations around the Salt Lake Valley to get a change of scenery and help those who may be farther away.

Because I don't want to announce openly on the internet where we are going and when, I will start a Facebook group to give us more privacy. If you're not already my friend, please hit me up. You can also comment here and I'll find you.

I hope to get a good size group going, so please invite anyone you think would be interested. I'm excited to not only get moving but expand my social circle as well.

I am ridiculous

I should start this post out on a positive note before I go diving into the reasons why I'm ridiculous. First, I'm really proud of myself for sticking to my daily exercise goals for most of the week (until the weekend), and for cooking nearly every single day (until the weekend). Most importantly, I didn't have any soda the entire week, PLUS the weekend!

But now, on to an entertaining anecdote about why I'm pathetic.

As per usual, this weekend was rough. For reasons that are varied, I consumed pizza, cheesy potatoes, cake, ice cream, leftover pizza, hot dogs, pulled pork and cookies.

But this isn't why I'm pathetic. This is only the beginning.

We had family over to dinner who are diet soda people, so we had fresh lime for their drinks. As I was slicing them I remembered just how much I love regular Coke with lime and, because my husband is awesome and only keeps soda I don't like in the house, my craving for cola was intense. Not enough to drink diet, mind you; I do have my standards. Instead, I put the leftover limes in a plastic baggie and tucked them away in the fridge.

I thought about those stupid limes all night (even while eating chocolate chip cookies!) and into the next day until I could contain the craving no more. Instead of breaking down and drinking the Diet Pepsi in the fridge, or even going to the store to buy a real Coke, I decided to take the limes into work and visit the precious, evil soda fountain there.

I am embarrassed to admit this, but I swear it was like I was smuggling a baggie of drugs, like I had to be furtive and hide the shame of my crime.

Moose Baby was in his high chair when I stashed the bag of limes first in my coat pocket, then in my purse where it would be safer, and when we made eye contact I'm telling you I could see disdain in his pudgy little face. I could almost hear him sigh and say, "I'm disappointed in you, mom. I thought you had moved past this, but I guess I was wrong."

But even that sad, psychologically-jarring reprimand did not stop me from carrying out my plan. I got to work even more determined to drink the stupid Coke and be done with the whole business, so I went straight up to the soda machine.

It was out of Coke.

Alas, even that did not deter me from consuming carbonation. I settled for stupid Pibb Xtra, squeezed in my stupid contraband limes, and drank my stupid forbidden soda.

And it was delicious.




This, my friends, is addiction.

Am I doing this right?

I've read more than once that to help keep your abs strong and your body aligned, you should engage your abs. Not just when you're working out, but in pretty much everything you do.

Engaging your abs is not sucking in, as as this fitness blog describes. It's like light flexing. You're not trying to show off your muscles and look cut, you're just keeping everything tight and tucked.

I've done this for years, and it really helps my back and posture—plus I look thinner (bonus!). But now I'm starting to wonder if I'm doing it right.

I first started thinking about this when I was pregnant, because engaging my abs was just not a possibility. When I stopped doing it, I noticed I could breathe deeper from my entire diaphragm. This is not so when my abs are engaged.

So, am I doing this right? If so, then does that mean engaging your abs is more important or better for you than deep diaphragm breathing, or is that kind of breathing not an all-the-time thing?

Anyone know?

Weekly recipe roundup

I've gotten a lot of questions about green smoothie recipes, so today's roundup is a step-by-step of how I make my smoothies. Keep in mind, though, that this is just a guideline. You can add anything you want, but this will give you the basics on how to make your own.

Ingredients

Here are the essentials: Fresh fruit, frozen fruit, greens, agave. You will need more than shown here, but this gives you an idea of what to buy.

You can use any fresh fruit you want. Apples, oranges and bananas are easy to get and cheap. I also really love fresh pineapple because it takes the bitter out of the greens easier.

You don't have to add any frozen fruit, but it's what makes it a smoothie. If you do all fresh, just add ice. Frozen is good because it's so easy to buy a giant bag of mixed fruit or berries (which are really good for you and turn the smoothie purple) rather than always having to keep so much fresh fruit on hand.

The agave is a natural sweetener that won't spike your blood sugar and is low cal. You don't have to add that either, it's just to make it sweeter.

Not pictured: Flax oil, or other essential oils. This is a great way to get them into your diet without a synthetic pill.

The main greens I use are spinach, kale and red chard (shown here) but you can use any dark leafy green: arugula, swiss chard, carrot tops, beet greens, collards, celery, etc. If you can't find them in your grocery store, try the organic section or a store like Whole Foods or Sunflower Market. I wash and cut up my greens and put them in a Tupperware Fridge Smart container so they're crisp and ready to go.

Instructions (for 4-cup smoothie)

Put 1 to 2 cups of water in your blender. Fill to the top with greens, unpacked.

Blend for about 30-60 seconds, or until liquefied.

Cut up fresh fruit and add to blender.

I usually give it a whirl for a few seconds to make room for the frozen fruit, which is added on top. Pictured here is a strawberry, mango and pineapple mix from Sam's Club.

Add agave (anywhere from a few tablespoons to 1/4 cup, to taste).

Using the smoothie button (if you have one), blend until smooth.

Pour in a portable drink container (like flip-top lid or nalgene bottle) or festive glass and drink up.

I have half of the smoothie throughout the morning and save the other half for my drive in to work around 2:30. You can drink it throughout the morning and the early part of your day and not even need lunch. The more greens you add, the longer you stay full.


Cheers!

Time to sober up

Last week started with a bang, with lots of fat-burning walks and good food. Then with the crappy weather (AGAIN) I lost all motivation to keep moving.

Then, as is becoming the norm, work sucked me into the dark side: I liberally snacked on donuts, chocolate and soda throughout the week. I would like to point out the cruel irony that just after I kicked my soda habit, they put in a soda fountain at work. Curse you, free and endless supply of Coca-Cola!!

Thankfully, I had a bit of a reality check yesterday when we took our little dude swimming for the first time. He had a blast, but not everything was roses for me. At first I was stoked that I fit into my swimsuit from two years ago (since last year's suit was maternity). Since I've had a baby, however, things are just not what they used to be. So while I started out in a swimsuit that fit, I ended with a suit that was practically falling off because it had been stretched to oblivion.

This is not the way I want to start swimsuit season.

Therefore, I am recommitting this week with a new set of goals:

• I will make my green smoothies daily. 
• I will do crunches every day.
• I will do at least 10 minutes of cardio every odd day.
• I will do push-ups every odd day.
• I will do lunges and squats every even day.
• I will celebrate my efforts.
• I will emerge victorious!

Weekly Recipe Roundup

These recipes come from readers Tammy and Danielle. Thanks, ladies, for your delicious contributions.

From Tammy:

Bran Muffins (Tammy Ault/Delsa Gifford)

Makes about 6 dozen

Cream together:

-1c shortening

-2 c sugar

-I tsp salt

-4 beaten eggs

Stir together and add to creamed mixture:

-5 c flour

-2 c bran flakes

-3 c all bran

-5 tsp soda

Add following and mix well:

-2 c boiling water

-2 cups raisins if desired

-1 quart buttermilk

Store in refrigerator up to six weeks using as desired.

To Bake:

Stir batter and fill greased or paper lined muffin tin 2/3 full. Bake for 20 min at 400 degrees.

A note from Tammy:

"I have started using unsweetened applesauce instead of the shortening. When you first make these up the batter will be runny but the bran will soak up the liquid a bit by the next day. Hope you enjoy them!"

Chicken Souvlaki Pita Sandwhiches

Makes about 4 servings

-2-3 chicken breasts

-2 tbsp low sodium soy sauce

-1/2 cup fresh lemon juice

-4 cloves of garlic, minced

-2 tsp olive oil

-1 tsp oregano

-2 whole wheat pitas cut in half

-1 large tomato

-2 cups shredded romaine lettuce

Whisk together soy sauce, lemon juice, garlic, olive oil and oregano and set aside..Cut chicken breasts into thin slices and put in above mixture, coating well. (I let mine marinate all day.) Cook chicken on stove top or bake in oven until thoroughly cooked.

Sauce for chicken

Mix well:

-1/2 cup fat free plain yogurt

-1/2 cup shredded cucumbers

-1 tbsp dried dill weed

-1/2 tsp garlic powder

Serve with sauce, chicken, shredded lettuce and tomatoes. Can also add onions and cheese if desired.

The next recipe comes from Danielle, who shared a link to an amazing and drool-inducing recipe blog For the Love of Cooking. I will DEFINITELY be checking that one out more often!

This recipe is for Chicken Lasagna. CLICK HERE to read and see step-by-step pictures along the way.

A note from Danielle: 

Like the woman says, it's really good when you need to gear up for a really big work out. What I found making this is, you can always add extra basil and garlic. Looks like a lot but when it cooks down, you don't get any pungent garlic taste. I also couldn't find baby bell peppers (aka sweet  peppers) so I used red orange and yellow bell peppers. 

That's it for this week. As always, please send recipes my way if you want to share the yumminess. Happy cooking!

Motivation: If not NOW, then when?

My motivation for today comes from two seemingly opposite sources: The Bible and The Onion, a satirical fake news site. I’ll begin with the more highbrow of the two.

There is a proverb that has always motivated me--or rather, has always haunted me as a warning: 

“He that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city that is broken down, and without walls.” -Prov. 25:28

This is telling me, “If you don’t take control of your life, get some discipline and set boundaries for what you will and won’t do, you will be at the mercy of everyone else but yourself.”

Now, when it comes to getting fit, sooner or later you have to take control of your health and your actions, or you will end up caving in again and again. You will never reach your goals and you will develop serious health problems, and possibly end up as one of those people who have to buy two plane tickets to accommodate their girth.

I’ve spent the past few years working on self-discipline in a number of areas, but I haven’t had success when it comes to saying no to bad foods‑hence the point of this blog.

THE TIME IS NOW! I am committed, and though it may time a lot of time to develop a wholly healthy attitude and lifestyle, I WILL ACCOMPLISH THIS.

Which leads me to my fun piece of motivation, a little humor from The Onion:

Report: Majority Of Americans Just Gotta, You Know, Get Motivated And Do It

An excerpt from the “article”:

“According to a new report from the National Association of Just Getting Out There and Getting It Done, when it comes to making it happen, a majority of Americans just have to, you know, get motivated and do it. The group's findings, which indicate nearly 80 percent of the nation needs to give it a shot at some point because, hey, you never know, suggest that the country can talk about it all it wants, but when it comes down to actually doing it, well, there's talking about things and then there's doing things.”

Back in the saddle again

First off, thanks everyone for your words of encouragement on my last post. That's a big reason I started this blog: to have virtual workout buddies to cheer me on and keep me going. Thanks for your compliments! I feel oh-so-special :)

I'm so glad I'm doing the picture thing. Four pounds wasn't a lot to lose, but seeing the difference visually was a HUGE confidence booster. I encourage anyone trying to get fit to do the same. Seeing progress is so much better than stressing on the scale.

Now that I've seen what a little extra effort can do, I'm getting motivated to REALLY work out and get my cardio going. Just think how much I could accomplish then!

But boring gym cardio is not my thing. It's a monotonous kind of torture that I never stick to because I hate it so much. This is probably because my I've played sports straight from age 5 to 21: soccer, tennis, track and rugby. Downgrading from sprints and tackle drills to a treadmill between some sweaty guy and ridiculously skinny girl does not a happy Lindsay make.

Even though running would be the easiest to integrate into my daily life I haven't wanted to go for it—until this weekend when I had to do an impromptu run, and it was awesome.

I was late for a performance at Kingsbury Hall. Parking on campus is a nightmare, so I had to park in the stadium and walk three long blocks (nearly half a mile) with just 10 minutes before curtain time. That's when I realized I had to pee, PRONTO. To be sure I'd have enough time, I took off in a dead sprint. This was no mild jog—I was hauling boo-tay. Even though I'm so out of shape my lungs were burning and I coughed for 10 minutes afterward, it was exhilarating.

I realized how much I miss really working hard and using my body to its healthiest potential. I felt this way for the last half of my pregnancy, when even if I wanted to go for it my giant, sluggish body wouldn't oblige.

Now that it's just me, there's no excuse.

So... anyone know where I can get a jogging stroller for cheap???

Judgment Day

The time is nigh.

It's been one month since I began this project, which means it's time to check my measurements and take the next fatty photo of the month.

I was dreading this moment. I've been struggling the last while, and this is the point my efforts will really show—or not. On the other hand, I have gone in one belt notch and my pants are saggy in the butt, AND I've really noticed my face slimming down. That can only mean one thing: I AM MAKING PROGRESS!!

But before I show you this month's pics, let's take a moment and reflect where I was 6 months ago, just 2 weeks before Evan was born:

What's even more shocking is how I looked in the hospital, after they pumped me so full of fluids I could have popped:

So, without further ado, I give you physical evidence of my progress. On the left is day 1, and on the right, today:

I was shocked and delighted to see the changes. The most obvious, as I said, is my face. My midsection is whittling down as well, and I was surprised to see the biggest change in my back. Probably from picking up my now-19-pound Moose Baby 20 times a day.

Here are my measurements, with day 1 on the left again and today on the right:

Arm:    13              12.5
Waist:   34             33.5
Hips:    42             40.5
Thigh:  25             25

Making for a grand total of 2.5 inches and 4 pounds lost.

Not bad for just making small changes!

I declare phase 1 of this project VICTORIOUS!!!!!